Heading into Tushars 100k I felt relaxed and excited, which was surprising given we weren’t sure until the week before if the race would even be held. Wildfires on the course required an entire reroute and I had spent the previous two weeks researching alternative FKTs to go after (and working myself up on how many cool things there are to do in so little time!) Thankfully, Aaron and Aravaipa pulled it off and the race was on! (Though I still have new cool goals on my list from the research).
Before Gorge Waterfalls 100k in April, I was a bit of a mental mess. I had a lot of people telling me how well I could do, that maybe I could podium, it was being live streamed, how cool is that? I let these voices have too much influence. I let other people's expectations influence my own goals and had no fun and a finishing time I wasn’t happy with.
In talking with my coach Chris Dawson, we decided the only goal for Tushars would be “a race I am proud of”. No time goal, no place goal, no effort or segment focus, just a race I could be proud of. I was pleasantly surprised how calm this kept me before the race! I was stoked, not anxious over how to go out fast or hold strong.
My friend Benjamin, who was coming to pace and crew and I drove down from Bozeman, camping one night on our way under the most incredible double rainbow either of us had ever seen!
Benjamin snaps his own photo of the rainbow majesty
This allowed us to keep Friday chill as we finished up the drive, winding our way into Fishlake National Forest and Eagle Point Resort. We set up camp and I went for a shakeout run, meeting up with Jeff on his arrival into the start/finish area from his Lake Tahoe adventure.
We hung out, eating my traditional pre race calzone with friends Sarah and Ali. Ali and Sarah also coach with Chris, and I met Ali pacing Sarah at Tahoe 200 a few weeks ago. We laughed, relaxed and headed to bed early, 4am comes very soon.
Under cover of stars Benjamin boiled some water for me to have hot tea while I dressed, slathered on Sawyer sunscreen and tied my shoes a few times to get them just right. Poles in hand I walked to the start line, ready to take it easy the first 20 miles (unlike Gorge) and chat with other racers.
The cool morning air and starlight felt great as we jogged through meadows and wound up towards the first of 3 different loops we would complete in the first ¾ of the race. I focused on moving well, but at a truly all day pace. Since most of the race is at or above 10,000 feet, Tushars is a loooong 100k. The views were stunning as we went around mountains, dropped to alpine lakes, and climbed back up to high meadows.
With the mandate to run a race I would be proud of, I let people pass me on big climbs without stressing over trying to stay ahead. There was lots of race left, it would be worth the time to eat a good snack here.
Sunrise in a moutnain meadow
I came into the crew zone a few minutes behind Ali, loaded up on ice and water (Jeff and Benjamin were great crew!) and took off on the second loop, which included Shelly Baldy, a long talus covered climb. I could see Ali and Stacey Marion up ahead, but still didn’t panic. There was no point trying to make up time in ankle breaking terrain.
Once I was back on the trail, I pulled out my headphones. I needed a beat to run to that would help get my cadence up. Unfortunately, I had forgotten to make sure my race playlist was downloaded and only the two songs I added since I wiped my phone (long story) were available. Oh well, beggars can’t be choosers. I played the same two songs back to back for about 40 minutes until I caught up with Ali.
We chatted and ran the end of the second loop together, one more loop to go before we could both grab a pacer. Jeff walked a little of the crew zone with me after the second loop, which was a nice break and a good way to check my head was in the right space. I told him I didn’t think I could win, but that was ok, that wasn’t my goal, I was happy with how I was doing. And now was the time to start seeing if keeping it relaxed early on would pay off. Jeff left me at the end of the crew zone and I did my best to start increasing the pace (or effort) on the loop. We were through the first half of the race, it was time to start applying some gas.
The yellow loop felt endless, with lots of “hints of trail” sections. I was so eager to get back to the aid station and get more ice in my buff to cool down. I spent a lot of this loop leap frogging with a fellow runner, who was kind and encouraging as we both grew weary of the exposed muddy meadows. Finally, we made it back. A bunch more ice, a full can of ginger ale, and Benjamin and I were off for a final out and back to finish the race!
We chatted as we hiked out of the aid station area, but once we hit the downhill I asked Benjamin to go ahead and set a pace that would make me run. He did a great job, pulling me along for several miles. We passed a few runners and even caught up to the runner who had been so helpful on the yellow loop. He let us pass, hopping in behind us. I heard him say to another runner, “Join the train. She’s been stunning all day. I’m just hoping to hang on.” I almost burst into tears. To have another runner recognize the hard work your putting in was so meaningful.
I had done so well eating in the first part of the day, but once it heated up, the altitude and warmth got to me and I managed probably 100-150 calories an hour, and a lot of that was from soda. It was enough to keep grinding, but not enough to regulate my emotions. I stayed pretty quiet as Benjamin and I kept moving forward.
I was trying to run anything flat or down or moderately uphill. City Creek Peak arrived on our left and we made our slow way to the top, battling winds and lack of trail to make it to 12,000 feet and a bracelet proving we made it. A glance at the views and back down we went. On towards the final turn-around aid station. I knew I needed real food, gels and soda were not going to keep me moving for another few hours. Thankfully, they had vegan quesadillas! I grabbed two and started walking back out.
The cheese and carbs made all the difference and I started moving faster and better than I had in a while. Benjamin, ever patient behind me, made sure I stayed on hydration and nutrition. Even though it was only 9 miles to the finish, it was going to be a long 9 miles. I pouted, but I listened and his insistence that I “eat a little something” definitely made the difference in finishing strong.
We pulled out headlamps and started the final few miles to the finish line. Even though I knew I wasn’t going to make sub 16 hours, I still pushed myself to run anything that wasn’t a crazy steep or long uphill. I wouldn't be proud of my race if I didn’t try hard. Benjamin let me know less than a mile from the finish that I had been in 3rd all day and was looking strong to get that shortly. I was happy, joking that I typically get third. I knew I had done all I could do that day, in that altitude, that weather, that terrain. I had no regrets and was proud.
Then we crossed the finish line to hear I was second! A woman ahead of me had dropped out. This meant I would get to share the podium with Ali too! A very nice surprise and a good lesson in not focusing just on time or results. Often our harshest critic and best judge is ourselves. Because I had never stopped trying, never got disheartened as people passed me, and kept my focus broader, I was able to do better than I thought possible!
A few snacks, a cup of tea, and a podium picture later, I was back in the tent and ready to sleep. What a great weekend of friends and trails and joy!
Me, Ali and Sarah, the Chris Dawson team
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